My very wealthy father in law died almost a year ago. He left everything to his firstborn son, ignored his other son, my husband. It’s turned into a major very costly legal battle, family dysfunction. Brother doesn’t speak to brother.
My father in law was a cruel father, played favorites with his sons. Even as a child, my husband tried everything to please his father to no avail, and now even in death my father in law continues to torment him. My husband has been experiencing major insomnia and exhaustion since the funeral, looks tired, ill. Emotionally he cannot understand why his father did this to him. Right after the funeral he started walked hunched over, like an old man. I joked that he was starting to walk like his father but now it’s not so funny because now he limps. His father had arthritis of the spine, difficulty walking. He recently brought some of his father’s clothing, glasses into the house even though the clothing doesn’t fit and he can’t use the glasses. He even uses some of the same phrases his father used to say regularly…I figured it was part of grieving process but this is just not going away & it’s been a year.
My adult son moved back home recently between jobs and started to complain the house is depressing, very dark although it is exactly the same house with no changes for the last few years. He says since he has moved back that he feels ‘terrible’, doesn’t understand why, keeps blaming it on the house. He actually saw a therapist last week who thinks he might be depressed, but she told him she just couldn’t figure out exactly what was wrong with him. My son visited friends out of town all last week, and said he felt great until he walked back into our house. He said he felt like he was walking into a black cave.
The other weird thing is that we are all noticing a very strange odor in parts of the house, almost like a decaying smell. It was so bad that I poured clorox all over the floor trying to get the smell out. There doesn’t seem to be any source for it. We have dogs, but they do not smell like this when we get close to them. The smell is occurring more and more frequently. There are only tile floors, the roof is new, and the odor is not always there.
The last straw that compels me to write you was that today my husband confided that the reason he is having so much trouble sleeping is that his father is waking him up around 2am (same time) by saying ‘you’ll be sorry sonny boy’. When I asked if he could be dreaming he says that he actually hears words being spoken to him. Then he starts to obsess over everything his father ever did to him and doesn’t sleep for hours.
I tried to find out more, but he closes down & refuses to talk about it except to say sometimes the words that he hears ‘are worse’. He says this started right after the funeral.
My son is freaked out & says we need to get out grandpa’s stuff, then get the house cleansed. Any advice? Thank you for anything you can suggest.
Greetings: Sorry for the delay. Your son is right. You must remove all of the things that belonged to his father, and then have the house cleansed. However. It is important to have your husband realize that this man, (the father) had nothing good for him, and he must release him entirely so that he can move on with his life. Money means nothing when ones very sanity is at stake. Tell your husband that he must not allow his father to possess him. If he wont listen, then take it upon yourself to remove the fathers items. Let me know what happens. Peace.
Thanks, we are throwing stuff out quietly wherever we can find it. Thanks again.